Me in my sunday best (terrence looking blur like sotong)

Baptism Sunday

I woke up this morning feeling like its any other morning. But somehow in the back of my head I knew it was gonna be different. I went to the kitchen to have breakfast with my parents and my dad would be doing his typical "ding ding ding" stir of coffee, my mom would be be toasting or preparing some food. I ate and didnt say much and just savoured the moment at the breakfast table. I had a quick look into the papers and went back into my room. Then it just dawned on me what was about to happen today. The magnitude of the moment had hit me there and then. I was gonna go to church with my parents and attend a full service with my family. *GASP* I paused, took a moment and thought about it all. It had been my prayer since I attended Glory. I always look at my peers, how their parents would drive them to chruch and they'd be worshipping together. Since then, it had always been sort of like a dream to have that happen. But today it sort of did.

I had always been apprehensive about baptism. I would always look at people with a mix sort of envy and disdain. I would think to myself, "hey, shouldnt you get baptised and join in?" and at the same time think "ah whatever, not important". I remember 6 years ago when i was seated next to my mom whilst my sister was going through her baptism ceremony. My mom was silent throughout the service and had a really long face. And as if it wasnt dire enough, she had added the coup de grace that was to scar me and haunt me for a real long time. She stared at me and said in the most sardonic, sacarstic and cynical tone possible. "Very good lah....Now your sister is baptised".
My heart still sinks a little whenever i thought about it.

It took all of 10 years for my family to move from my home to their first christmas service. It took all of 11 years for my family to attend their first service, albeit it being my baptism (i'll gladly take that, thank you). It took 6 years (since mich got baptised), for me to muster enough courage to go for baptism (that includes inviting my parents to the service). But most importantly, it took me all of eternity (10 years as well) to realise the importance of a close relationship with God. (or it'd be all a futile attempt) I drove us to the back of the church and I lead my family into the church. I greeted everyone i knew along the way with a smile. But really, I was breeming in my heart. Was so so so elated.

Upon entering the chapel I promptly looked for a row of seats for my family. I was abruptly ushered to the front row as all baptism candidates were supposed to be. I began recalling all those early days of going to youth camp in defiance. And all the events that ensued that brought so much tears. I was thinking about all that and at the same time looking back at my family sitting there.When i snapped out of it, I remember singing the song He is worthy. And how apt. He is indeed worthy of all praise. All those years of hurt and pain. All those days and days and days of prayer by my bedside just crying out, asking that my parents would just turn up even if it is for that one time. He answered my prayer (and the prayers of all those who prayed for me) with a "YES! There you go"





(ok getting too emo + gonna have to book in an hour....yes...book in! will have to add details + testimony at another time)

The ceremony

The Goh family at Glory Prebyterian Church

My testimony

I grew up in a family where worshiping idols and ancestors was the norm. As a child, I just followed my parents' orders in obedience and often feared offending the “spirits and deities”. There were occasions when I recalled asking for an explanation as to why we had to do so but was never given a proper one.

I have an elder sister and a younger brother and always thought that there was something wrong with being a middle child. Growing up, I didn't have many friends and was always trying to join my brother and sister. But I was often rejected and didn't quite fit in. I remember an instance when my sister and her friends would lock themselves in the room and I would be crying and banging the door begging for them to let me in.

The theme of low self-esteem was to plague me throughout school. In primary school, I was often rejected when project groups were being formed. In secondary school, I was always tried to be popular and fit in but to no avail. My peers didn't like me and neither did I.
It was during my early teenage years that I sought the meaning of life and existence. I told my parents that I was going to find out for myself what life meant and they told me to consider Buddhism and Taoism. I didn't find out much about the two religions and often found the rituals empty. But deep down inside I wanted to find out about God. Even before deciding on choosing Christ as my Lord and saviour, God had already left the good news in my heart. I had already heard the gospel then through the sharing of my vice-principal in primary school. That left an impression of who Jesus Christ was.

It was from the thing that I dreaded most that God called for me. I was poor in Chinese and needed tuition classes to improve my results. I dreaded going for Chinese lessons as I didn't like the subject and was not good at it. But it was through my tutor's sharing that I came to know who Jesus was. Through her sharing, I understood that we were all sinners and God had died on the cross to save us from sin. And the analogy put across to me was that life was like a candle, God lights your candle, you burn for Him and continue to light others. I was really touched by that and accepted Christ as my personal saviour in my life during one of a Good Friday service at that period of time.
Then, my sister was already attending Glory church and asked me along with her. It was in those years while attending youth fellowship at the church that I found out more about Christ and His teachings. I faced some resistance from my parents when I first came to know the Lord. It was through having a relationship with Christ that my confidence grew. “I can do everything through God who gives me strength.” (Philipians 4:13 )

After a few years, I wasn't really very serious about my faith and grew lukewarm in my walk with God during my army days. I would go through the motion of coming to church, having lunch and then return home. I would join several programs that the church organized but that didn't change anything. I received God as my saviour but not as my Lord. I was the master of my own domain and struggled in school as well. This went on for years.

It was only upon joining bible study fellowship and a discipleship course that I began to study God's word with more intent. Through those two events, I found out what it was like to have a personal relationship with God. Even though I had accepted Christ as my saviour earlier in my life, it was only then that I began to acknowledge Him as the Lord of my life.

I finally saw the importance of centering your life about God and allowed Him to be the Lord of my life. Since then, it has become much clearer to me what being a follower of Christ is like. “But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matt 6:33

I am no longer struggling as the master of my domain but have instead, found real purpose in seeking God. Be it at work, at play, in relationship with others or at serving in God's ministries, God has been a source of inspiration and strength.